im sick of writing every song about you

Wed, 24 Oct 2007 18:17:01 GMT

im tired.. its cold.

im fed up with the constant bullshit that i have to put up with.
this year, ive certainly had enough.
its sooo much to deal with and i cant seem to get past it.
when i think ive put it behind me, it creeps up and rears its ugly head.

it strikes without warning and leaves just as quickly.
to the few that are around, i cant thank you enough for helping me help myself.
to those that are never there... yr never there and it doesnt matter now just like it never did ever.
to those that are around when theres only bad news, fuck you.
you dont care, yr only around to save face..
and its not my face that needs saving..

... its my sanity

Mon, 25 Dec 2006 22:10:51 GMT

wishing everyone from the past, present, and anyone i will meet in the future
a madtastic christmas this year. keep safe, and dont drink to much noggin.

Thu, 07 Sep 2006 13:58:15 GMT

"...and i never need to see the sun again, there's enough light in your eyes to light up our little world."

with a new day comes new opportunity.

new opportunities to change
new opportunities to make things right
new opportunities to bring joy and happiness back into people's lives

help me

to become

anything and everything

i can

Wed, 06 Sep 2006 20:22:02 GMT

So Help Me...

if things dont start picking up for everyone around me
i definitely think im going to kill someone or something..

all the stress floating around between people is
stressing me the fuck out and i need to escape
only i cant because school just started..

Sun, 12 Mar 2006 15:47:11 GMT

I'll never need to see the sun again

There's enough light in your eyes to light up our little world

So take me, take my away

Fri, 16 Dec 2005 05:37:25 GMT

the life of me has been quite busy, repetitive, and cold.
while the snow has been awesome, i need to buy my new snowboard
shit so i can take advantage of the near future (it looks oh so promising).

so i only had 1 exam which was art history and the whole study part for it was kinda
funny cuz goldie stole my computer to hit up her scenester account over ony myspace.
before and after the exam, goldie and i both had retard faces on cuz it wasnt what we expected at all.

work has been awesome. tonite i got to leave early because im oh so awesome at rock, paper, scissors.
it was slow so i went a round or two and clobbered my opponent with a paper, rock combo.
so far, ive worked 9 out of the past 10 days, i work until christmas, get christmas day off, then work every day till new years.
this means im gonna get maaaad moneys that will go towards paying off the christmas visa bill (which is horrendous and i dont even want to think, or talk, about it at all).

christmas presents excite me cuz i looooove giving them and i bought lots of cool gifts. ive been reading the interwebnet at work in my down time and i will not be able to live or function properly without buying the 2nd season box set of the l word. im hooked on that show like you wouldnt believe. that show is addictive as crack, tobacco, blow jobs, and whatever else you can think of. bought special people OC boxed sets and matt good cds and both can entertain the hell out of you if you let them.

now that im on break, im slowly visiting everyone whom i havent seen in ages (or what feels like it) and its awesome. seeing everyone in pickering again, seeing a small amount of scarborough folk, and hopefully the newmarket folk. ive been seeing alot of the kyle, atleast compared to how much ive seen him ever, and its been cool.

Joh's party last weekend in king city was quite fun although i felt like a perve. all the 15-17 years olds there kind of made me nervous. kyle and i had a contest to see who could out-do the other. kyle's shirt came off so i had to ditch the pants.. it was comfy but again, felt like old uncle perverto, so the pants came back on.

not looking forward to work at all the next couple of weeks.
i think my last week of vacation, i actually wanna take vacation and run away some where awesome and just relax, not worry about anything, and have a blast. most likely wont happen but atleast i can pretend

to everyone i know, everyone i care about, everyone that matters to me...

happy fuckin christmas and dont be a stranger..
if i dont talk to you, happy fuckin new years and
have a drink on me!

Sun, 02 Oct 2005 07:48:06 GMT

holy shit.. 2 nights in a row, 2 updates..

tonite was a fuckin waste of life.

i worked all day and found out that, while i have 8 free tickets to this photo/digital imaging show through work thats ognna be awesome and amazing and all these different camera companies are gonna be displaying new products and doing demos and info sessions on new products, old products and wicked products, i get fucked in the ass (yet again) and am working ALL 3 DAYS IN A ROW THAT THE FUCKING SHOW IS GOING ON FOR!! what the fuck is that shit?? also, everyone is car pooling up to the digital imaging show on the 3 days/nights but no, as usual, im fuckin left out/ i hate feeling like the black sheep everywhere i go..

anyways..

after work, i have to go meet up with whitey and shoot the rest of this wedding for his aunt or someone equally as clever in his family and boy what a half mistake that was. while it was cool to see what it was like, it wasnt too eventful considering i missed the beforehand shit, and the ceremony itself (i showed up halfway through the reception) but yeah.. i guess its a nice learning experience. wouldnt really mind doing it again considering it pays well. the only problem is i have like 300 photos to go through, pick or delete, and edit on top of the 2 essays i have to write this week as well as visit the sonya tomorrow nite, go to school and work throughout the week. (i love when my life feels like a train wreck)

to top it all off, upon leaving the reception, not 3 minutes on the road, matt decides to go and blow not one, but 2 of his tires. on the same side of the car.. so, both left tires are blown out. we try to jack the car up.. the cars jackd but its leaning into the side of the wall under teh udnerpass and crushing the mirror. i fold the mirror in, and BOOM car falls off jack.. ok, no worries right? we'll just jack up the backj wheel and put the spare on there and save ourselves some time.. bad idea.. matt tries to jack that shit up and POOF car is now on a rear flat and a front brake pad.. fuck it.. lets call CAA.

bad idea folks...

CAA informs us we have 2 hours to wait for a tow truck. we planned on visiting uncle ethan and being all YO WHATS UP MAH NIGGUHS IN THE UNCLE ETHANS HIZZOUSE! but no.. fate once again, fucks not just me, but whitey in the ass. (fate got laid waaay too many times tonite from us alone) ABRAHAMS TOWING shows up finally and gets his shit on. and by shit, i mean shitting all over us. he tells whitey and i that it'll be 65$ to re-jack the car, put a tire on and then 85$ for service to do next to nothing at all, then 65$ for a dolly for the back wheels because the guy was a wise ass and put the spare tire on the front brakepad so he could make more money.. on top of that, he tells us that he wants to charge 3.50$/km to a 24 hour used tire lot at dufferin and dundas. currently, were wasting our lives away at bayview and lawrence west. if you do the math, its about 40km distance. mso, we argue, almost beat the shit out of this tow truck driver, and follow him to this shit heap of a garage. i swear i was gonna kill tonite.. whitey practically did with all of the fucks and shits and assholes he yelled at the guy. 2:30 rolls around and imm like fuck it, i gotta go home cuz im piss tired and need to sleep so i can go to work tomorrow except, here i am .. cant sleep, worried about those closest to me, wondering what things are like, wondering how people are feeling. i wish i could just fuckin erase today and forget it ever happened..

lets hope if i go to sleep tonite that when i wake up, tomorrow is such a better day. i hope i can get a lot of sales done tomorrow at work on our slowest day of the week.. maybe i can bring my textbook to work on my essay only not because i'll get bitched at if i do.. wow, lets hear it for life..

and i really want to go to the hershey centre tomorrow with whitey so i can steal some more banners and possibly skate teh street course like what happened last year.. probably wont happen cuz im a chump... oh well, c'est la vie

ps: im a frog

"everyone i know goes away in the end"

Sat, 01 Oct 2005 04:58:05 GMT

so my life has been quite fulfilling the past couple of.. well, i guess the past week and a bit. school has been going quite nicely. everyone in my photo history class thinks that they're god and its super wicked to hear what they have to say when the class opens up into debates. but then really, its annoying as hell and i am constantly quoted as wishing they woudl all die. seriously. workload is going alright, not too heavy (although im nto too sure about that cuz i dont have all of my sylabuss') i love being downtown constantly cuz it makes me feel so independent and that i can live my own life without having to answer to anyone and have no worries. the only worries i have are when i go home cuz it sometimes feels awkward now. in other news, i bought a new camera. its a sick manual focus nikon fm2. i bought it in the used section at work for 135$ with a 1yr warranty and i almost shit myself at the condition it was in. it came in the original box and this mother has never been used. i really wanna see what this camera can do (moreso, the inspiration it'll give me to take photos) but yeah, havent seen the muffster in awhile but hopefully i can go visit her on sunday and we can do something fun cuz we need to hit up some funtime adventures soon or i'll be upset. whitey is shooting a wedding tomorrow which is fun and iw ish i could go helkp but i dont think i'll be able to get off work early for it. tonite erin, nicole and myself went on a double date type-esque adventure with kyle and jo. we met kyle and jo at sals cuz kyle was getting some color put on his wrists. after that, we made a quick stop at the lcbo and i bought some drinks to enjoy at a later date. we went to cafe crepe and it was amazing (as always) then watched a movie back at the homestead (well, home from home i guess.. technically its not my home) but eitehr way, it was some good times. i get to work all weekend adn then hopefully go visit the muff on sunday night, then work/do up that school thing all next week. ips: im super stoked for this guy STUART EVERITT at work cuz he had to quit last week. im not stoked at the fact that he quit (im kinda upset about it cuz he was a fuckin cool guy) but yeah. he got offered a job a a full time phototgrapher on a cruise line so hes gonna be doin that for the next while. thats me and the life ive been living the past little while. hopefully i win the lottery or something else equally as amazing so my financial woes can all go to hell. yeah thas right, it can happen.

Mon, 19 Sep 2005 06:21:44 GMT

the secret, not so secret life of my last couple of days starts now:

+ me and paul are iBOOK cru
+ went to the used show on tuesday a nd ran into mikey which was awesome. everytime i talkto that guy its amazing.. he gives me hope cuz hes a super cool, super upbeat, super positive guy.
+++ went to moneen show the night after and met hippy and pete (drummer) again and pete gave me a free tshirt
+ had a crazy skate session on saturday and got lots of pictures.
- whitey got in a car accident, although he is ok, his car is not
- he owes me 70$
+ school has been fuckin amazing for various reason.. mainly cuz i saw a bunch of people i ahvent seen all summer, because my classes are more or less awesome, and because i temporarily live with the most beautiful girl ever
+ ive finally paid off my debts which included my new 1600$ camera, and my new ibook
- i have no money for the next little while and think it was a bad idea to temporarily lend mr white those moneys
+- friday night; made uncle Jagermeister my bitch and then went to some random club super tanked cuz it was erins friends birthday.
+ after we got back from the club, whitey dropped the pizza on the floor and i collapsed into the door cuz it was fucking hilarious

thats pretty much been my life the past couple of days (week or so) and i hope everything continues to be this awesome.
i have to work tomorrow from 11-9 and then mad hussle downtown to uncle ethans birthday party at redroom. hopefully i can get my money from mr white tomorrow or else my ass is broke for the next 2 weeks (or whenever i see him again which will probably be the end of the week) maaad shitty.

im writing again, these letters to you...

Wed, 01 Jun 2005 16:08:12 GMT

only theyre not the letters you want to recieve.

all i can say is i hope youre happy. i hope youre happy with what youve done. i hope youre happy with what youve said. i hope youre happy that you chose to tell me all the shit you said AFTER i hadthe worst week of bad news ever. yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay, go mountain of shit that just keeps getting bigger. notice how you can actually see this post? hmmm.. i wonder why.

fuck you.

i hope you have fun tonite at your gay little etobicoke dick sucking party. if i ever see said etobicokian, im gonna stab their eyes out with forks so they cant look at anyone ever again. in a while i'll have calmed down but right now all i know is that you seriously need to fucking chill out and fuck off.

...youre timing was perfect...

Thu, 26 May 2005 14:21:33 GMT

They love the earth
Lies are serving fire and brimstone we move the backbone
Say hello to sunshine, wake up youre baptized

The temple is me
Something to believe in
It's something to be
The evidence is all we taste

Under the skin the heart is pumping
What brought you to this
What once was useless
Focus on the vision
Lose sight of the picture

The temple is me
Something to believe in
It's something to be
The evidence is all we taste

Man makes changes
Man wants everything
Man makes changes
Man wants everything
Everything

Mon, 17 Jan 2005 06:34:51 GMT

last nite i took a stroll down to the opera house to watch some friends play.. there was an indie battle of the bands and i had to bring my friends bass pedal for his drums from pickering to downtown in just over an hour. i ended up getting it there on time, but not really anyone else made it in time to see them play. the dumb fucks made them play first with the smallest crowd..

needless to say, they lost due to "lack of crowd participation." ya, its a catch 22.on a lighter note, here are the DECENT pictures that i managed to take before my camera died (an hour after being fully charged). there are more if you follow the link: http://photobucket.com/albums/v48/bacon/swindle kings opera house/?

so here are the pictures. i think they could have been alot better but oh well.. i say that about all my pictures:

Tue, 09 Sep 2003 02:09:28 GMT

well now.. where to begin? how about with the nothign that ive endured since school started. ive been at school for a week now (a week after tomorow) and all ive managed to do is switch my retard math for photography and then sit there and listen to teachers drone on about nothing. most of the time they drone on about assignments and instructions on what to do but im too cool for school and i dont pay attention.

we have a new art teacher who weve already cracked. im officially my class leader which means that when the teacher attempts to explain something, i get to reinterpret it for the class cuz theyre all morons and such. yesterday me and sabre went skating for the day and boy did that blow.. we got to teh skatepark and it was packed tighter than, well... insert a funny phrase here but ya.. it was gay so we were gonna go downtown to skate but the gay 42 cummer to finch station bus never showed.. so we skated down to um... some street and got on the bus to mccowan. we ended up at scabtown and walked around to see if any of the bulk barn kids were working.. turns out the only person working was emma and she couldnt even get us any free candy! damn..

after seeing emma we made a run to the pretzel shack to ese if godo ol paul was working.. once again, a no show. we didnt even end up getting any free food! boo to that. we skated around the mall at various spots.. most of them sucked just as bad as we did and our potential day of skating had withered down to a 45 minute skate session of a small curb and a bench. god, i need to learn either a) to stop sucking so bad or b) learn to go skating when everyone and their little brother (with a scooter) isnt at the skatepark.

p.s. my philosophy teacher keeps pointing out the fact that im going to die. and im way mega super jealous of christie's run in with a.w.k. id fuckin kill to meet him. or have him offer to get me into his show for free.. DAMN YOU

im trying to forget to wonder why

Thu, 14 Aug 2003 02:02:29 GMT

im super pissed/confused that i cant get any of my fuckin pictures on here working.. everytime i put them on, they work for like 10 minutes and then after that, they gay up on me... damn flame gay crap ass pictures.. y doesnt anythign ever work out for me? oh ya, and the shining is on citytv right now; badass movie cuz its 80s horror to the max.. i suggest you watch it if youve never seen it before.. thats all ig ot for now and lets just see if this picture here works:

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Mon, 11 Aug 2003 03:15:42 GMT

yeah... new rancid record comes out on the 19th... so go buy it

FRIENDS ONLY

Mon, 11 Aug 2003 02:08:32 GMT

So ive decided against randoms viewing my life.
as uneventful as it is, im still a cool guy
but i dont need crazy stalkers or el pervertos
to know that.

comment me, add me, get my attention somehow.
if youre tolerable, maybe (if im in a good mood) will add you.

its ok, i usually add anyone cuz im just that cool.. or lame..